Sunday, August 12, 2012

The Amazing Briefs

So I am in line to buy Debbie Boone, the AMAZING metal chicken, http://boonefamilyupdates.blogspot.com/2012/08/metal-chickens-really-do-make-for-best.html, and remember that I am in need underwear. I decide to make a mad dash to grab some instead of my normal 'forget it, I will get it next time'. Which my normal 'forget it' is exactly why I NEED to get underwear. So I hold Lilly's hand and wheel our cart to the back of the store (because Murphy's Law is very accurate in that what you forget is furthest from you at the time of the remembering.)

Now mind you I am road tripping so I am not looking for anything of the raise an eyebrow variety here, just a 3 pack of good ole fashion cover your ass underwear. So I look at sizes, see mine and grab em. Whoohoo I bought everything I needed, which yes included a chicken and underwear and I am very pleased with my awesomeness.

We get back to the room and I tear them open and all I can say is... well... nothing I was laughing to hard...

First to really understand the world of womens underwear you have to really take a look at the sizing...

apparently you measure an area in which most normal unwear will not have contact with...

Okay so back to my underwear... the Amazing Briefs as I have now dubbed them...

SERIOUSLY, I am not a big gal and this was the "correct" size. As I threw the packaging away I can only assume I have purchased something along the lines of 'ridiculously bloated size blah blah with extra giant torso". I know right, I didn't know they made those either.

The sides of these beauties are the same length as my almost 4 year old shoes! Okay a big part of the humor is the size so I just have to give it to you, these are a size 8 people!!


I have found the Amazing Briefs can give you a gangster housewife look because your pants can be on appropriately AND have 3 inches of underwear showing from the top! (thats hotel carpet, I am not awesome enough to pull that off at home)




4 comments:

W FAMILY said...

I just laughed so hard I spit out my coffee.....Rock that gangster housewife from the hood look!

Melissa@TheHappierHomemaker said...

I totally did the same thing when I was pregnant-they were big enough to pull over my nine month belly!

Jen E said...

Are you sure you're a size 8 in undies? That's a big gal size. I have 7s and 8s and I am 50-60lbs overweight. It's not the same as pants size! LMBAO

Carrie Boone said...

hahaha, maybe that was my problem! I am apparently too ADD to take the time to understand underwear! To think I mocked the measuring chart!